Mother’s Day is supposed to be all about breakfast in bed, handmade cards, and maybe even a little pampering. But let’s be honest, for families raising a child with autism, the day can look a little different. Sometimes it’s a quiet BBQ at home, sometimes it’s just another day of the usual routine, and sometimes it’s a mix of laughter, tears, and everything in between. Here’s a peek behind the curtain, with stories and thoughts from autism moms who know this journey inside and out.
When Mother’s Day Isn’t the Hallmark Card
If you scroll through social media, you’ll see picture-perfect Mother’s Day moments. For autism moms, the reality can be a little messier, and a lot more meaningful.
- One mom from Autism Awareness Australia shared how she realized her son was autistic on Mother’s Day, thanks to an app and a gut feeling she just couldn’t shake. Her advice? Trust your instincts, and find a good pediatrician early on. She spends her Mother’s Day reflecting on the year’s progress, usually with a simple BBQ at home, soaking up the little victories.
- Another mom, Judy, whose son was diagnosed over 30 years ago, says the early days were filled with confusion and a lot of unsolicited advice. Now, at 65, she looks back and urges younger moms to put their own health first. She’s big on celebration days, but does it her way: cake for breakfast, a stroll down memory lane with family photos, and a heart full of gratitude for the journey.
- Tina Velazquez wrote a letter to her son, thanking him for teaching her patience, resilience, and how to truly listen. She admits she once wished her son could be like the other kids, but now she sees his differences as gifts. “You are exactly who you’re supposed to be. You are perfect,” she writes.
The Not So Secret Life of Autism Moms
Let’s call a spade a spade. Autism moms wear a lot of hats: advocate, therapist, cheerleader, sometimes even mind reader. While the world might not always see the hard work, these moms know their kids love and appreciate them, even if the words aren’t always there.
- Some moms admit that Mother’s Day is just another day. The meltdowns, the repetitive questions, the early mornings, they don’t take a holiday. But that doesn’t mean the day isn’t special. If anything, it makes the love that much deeper.
- Others find themselves fibbing when asked how their Mother’s Day went, just to avoid awkward conversations. It can sting when the day doesn’t match up to the hype, but many moms say they’ve learned to find joy in their own way, even if it’s a little unconventional.
What Autism Moms Wish Others Knew
If you’re not living the autism journey, it can be hard to understand. But here are a few things often shared by autism moms and families:
- Milestones might look different. A first word, a new food tried, a meltdown avoided, these are all reasons to celebrate.
- Every family’s experience is unique. Don’t assume you know what someone else is going through.
- Sometimes, the best gift is a little peace and quiet. Or maybe just a nap.
- Support matters. Whether it’s a kind word from a stranger or a community sports group that welcomes all emotions, those little acts of kindness go a long way.
Insights and Encouragement
- Focus on what your child can do, not just what they can’t.
- Take care of yourself, because it’s a marathon, not a sprint.
- Celebrate the small victories, even if they look different from what you expected.
- Remember, being present and loving is what matters most.
Mother’s Day isn’t always picture perfect, but for autism moms, it’s a day to pause, reflect, and maybe even eat cake for breakfast. The love is real, the challenges are real, and the gratitude runs deep. Autism moms truly make the world a brighter place, and their journeys are worth celebrating, every single day.
Citations:
- Silberman, S. (2016, February 8). NeuroTribes: The Legacy of Autism and the Future of Neurodiversity. Semantic Scholar. https://www.semanticscholar.org/paper/53d4363e6fccc892d46e7efcbd35a82beb86c18b
- Autism Speaks. (n.d.). Thank you, Moms, for inspiring us all. https://www.autismspeaks.org/blog/thank-you-moms-inspiring-us-all
- Dayspedia. (2025, April 27). Autism Super Mom Day in United States in 2025. https://dayspedia.com/us/calendar/holiday/4192/
- PubMed. (2012, January 3). Yet Life Keeps Coming. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24406886/
- Full Spectrum ABA. (2025, May 6). Autism Moms Make the World Brighter: Mother’s Day 2025. https://www.fullspectrumaba.com/post/autism-moms-make-the-world-brighter-mother-s-day-2025
- Autisable. (2025, May 4). Eleven reasons why autism moms deserve a special Mother’s Day. https://autisable.com/2025/05/04/eleven-reasons-autism-moms-deserve-special-mothers-day/
- UConn Today. (2025, April 2). This World Autism Awareness Day a proud mom celebrates her young daughter’s advancement of science. https://today.uconn.edu/2025/04/this-world-autism-awareness-day-a-proud-mom-celebrates-her-young-daughters-advancement-of-science/
- Autism Speaks. (n.d.). A salute to mothers of children with autism. https://www.autismspeaks.org/blog/salute-mothers-children-autism
- My Daily Bloom. (2025). Mothers Day 2025 – Autism Mom College Personalized Hardcover Journal Notebook. https://mydailybloom.com/products/mothers-day-2025-autism-mom-college-personalized-hardcover-journal-notebook
- PubMed. (2011, February 1). Commentary for Special Issue of Autism Research on Mouse Models in ASD: A Clinical Perspective. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21328567/
